The Happy Happy Joy Club
By David Glenn Cox

Being the youngest of three children I grew up cynical, it was only natural. After being used and manipulated a number of times by my siblings, I learned to read the fine print.

"Mom says we can have some cookies if you go get them."

"David! What are you doing in that cookie jar? You know better than that! You know that you have to ask first! Now get out of there!"

"But, Mom?"

"Don’t but mom me, get out of there!"

Writing With One Hand Tied Behind My Back
By David Glenn Cox

For the better part of two decades I have played guitar, writing and singing songs, chasing a dream that always eluded me. After much hard work I managed to raise myself up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty, until I was forced to get a real job.

His Time is Short
By David Glenn Cox

Were the US economy a patient in a hospital, this is the part when the doctor walks out, shaking his head, and talks to the family. "I’m sorry, we’ve tried everything that we know to do. We’ve cut interest rates three times and we can’t cut anymore. We’ve put the banks on respirators to keep them functioning, but it's done no good. We’ve even pumped in rebate checks to get money circulating back into the economy, but the effects were only temporary. The body just used them to pay past-due bills."

All In the "McCain" Family
By David Glenn Cox

"Boy da way Glenn Miller played,"
"Songs I’ve heard on my I-pod today"
"Gee, those S&L’s were great"

"Those were the days!"

"Didn’t need no welfare state!"
"Enron contributions pulled the weight."
"Gee my Exxon stock did great!"

"Those were the days!"

"And you knew who Jews were then!"
"Girls was girls and Larry Craig just friends"
"Mr. we could use a man like W in there again (piano trill) Me!
"Everybody seemed content, no unhappy lobbyists"

"Those were the days!!"

Leased, Last, Lost
By David Glenn Cox

Chrysler announced the other day that they would discontinue their automotive lease program. When I first heard this I assumed that it was to due to credit-related issues and Chrysler being under new management. Then I heard that Ford and GM are mulling over the same idea, and it has nothing to do with credit.

Be Careful What You Wish For
By David Glenn Cox

The Peoples Corporate Republic of China, the world's largest slave labor plantation, have sought desperately to showcase to the world their Two Systems -One China policy by hosting the Olympic games.

It's All Your Fault
By David Glenn Cox

It is easy to be angry these days; it could be said that to be an American these days is to be angry. If you’re not angry, maybe you need to stop watching American Idol, put down your cell phone, and look out your car window for a minute as you drive on your $4.00 a gallon gas. I have seen things that I thought I would never see.

A Crooked Man,A Crooked Road
By David Glenn Cox

The good news is that there is no good news, the bad news? Well, that’s the good news. Bush and McCain say that it is the surge that has brought relative calm to Iraq. Obama claims it was more due to Anbar awakening. Who is correct? Neither is correct, both are absolutely wrong.

News, No News and Not So News
By David Glenn Cox

I can’t stand to hear a grown Republican cry. McCain likes to spout his differences from George Bush, but he uses the same playbook: when you’re losing, go negative. Today he has become John of Arc, burned for his beliefs by the New York Times, excuse me, make that the Liberal New York Times. And I take offense at that term because I am a liberal and they are no friends of mine!

Catch 23
By David Glenn Cox

Probably the most profound statement made by a US President in the last fifty years was, "It all depends on what your definition of is, is." We no longer have Presidents who make profound statements, they would be lost over the heads of the masses and so the old axiom kicks in: If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.

Calamity John
By David Glenn Cox

Oh boy, they’re really mad now! First, in May, John McCain and the RNC challenged Barack Obama to go to Iraq to see for himself the facts on the ground. The RNC installs a clock on their website; "Obama has done shockingly little to educate himself firsthand about the war in Iraq. Instead, he displays an arrogant certainty gained on the campaign trail. ... Obama’s failure to visit Iraq, listen and learn firsthand and witness the surge’s progress demonstrates weak leadership that disqualifies him from being commander in chief." -- RNC Chairman Mike Duncan

Patriotism or Idiotism
By David Glenn Cox

"How you, O Athenians, have been affected by my accusers, I cannot tell; but I know that they almost made me forget who I was – so persuasively did they speak; and yet they have hardly uttered a word of truth." (Socrates)

The Seething
By David Glenn Cox

People generally are passive and understanding, but as the pressure builds the passivity evaporates and what is left behind is a crystallized seething. A feeling that says, "I’m being screwed and I’m tired of it and you hide and watch what happens to the next person that tries it." President Bush made a You Tube appearance where he waved to onlookers as he stepped off Air Force One and they just stared back at him. (No caption necessary) Their silence spoke volumes; they ignored his presence, as one unwelcome, and wouldn’t dignify it with even an acknowledgment.

"As GM Goes, So Goes the Nation"
  By David Glenn Cox

"As GM Goes, So Goes the Nation." Such was the conventional wisdom in the 1960’s when GM churned out Chevelles, Camaros, Cutlasses, Catalinas, and Cadillacs by the millions. Maybe the saying "runs like a Cadillac" will outlive the company; maybe "As GM Goes, So Goes the Nation" has never been truer. GM’s future is bleak, analysts predict that GM may soon go broke as new car sales stumble.

    When Money Goes Out the Door, Love Flies Out the Window
     By David Glenn Cox

How do you explain it? Without need or justification Barack Obama has begun the Democratic death spiral. Like a moth to a flame or a lemming to the cliff, the presumptive Democratic nominee has started moving toward the center. Like Charlie Brown, running at full steam towards Lucy with the football, unburdening himself of his principles along the way to build up speed. But the Republicans will pull the football away by moving to the right of the political spectrum and Charlie Brown will land flat on his back and look foolish in doing it.

Independence Day
By David Glenn Cox

There is nothing new under the sun, the murder of Caesar or the shots in Dallas. Conspiracies demand either victims or adherents. You’re either with us or agin us, sound familiar? We must all hang together or certainly we shall all hang separately. Ah, but that’s the point entirely! To hang you separately! You, who toil for a living, to educate children or deliver bread, or drive a beer truck or embalm the dead, all separated like the fingers on a hand.

Hey Y’all Watch This!
By David Glenn Cox

When did you stop beating your wife? When will you prove yourself innocent? When will you stop lying? When will you produce the murder weapon? All of these statements presuppose guilt and had this prolonged campaign against Iran not mimicked the prolonged campaign against Iraq it would be easy enough excuse the surreal nature of it all. The Alice through the looking glass, world turned upside down flavor to it of the leader who hasn’t invaded anyone cast as the next Hitler by the nation occupying two foreign countries by force of arms.

Tomatoes Are Like Motorcycles
By David Glenn Cox

Across the vast wasteland of the American dreamscape there is one who dare not show his face. Considered meaner than the lowest child molester and kicker of small dogs, this is one who would pee in swimming pools just for spite. Republicans revile him while Democrats look at the floor and slowly shake their heads with unadulterated disgust. A virulent strain of villain who would dare propose protectionism. Protectionism! Why the very word makes the honorable want to spit, the very thought is almost outright anarchism!